Her Rules Radio

There are many challenges to being a creative person. I’ve experienced many of those challenges, and we’ve discussed many of them here on the show. Today’s show will inspire us to make it through a crisis situation to thrive in your craft. In addition, we’ll be taking a sabbatical of sorts after today’s show, but Her Rules Radio will be back soon with more interesting guests and perspectives.

Christine Dixon is an actress whom I met on Instagram. Since then, we’ve had many email and video conversations, and I knew that her story was one that my listeners needed to hear. Her experiences bring up many themes around the obstacles that creative thinkers face in putting their work and ideas out into the world. Chris has been performing her one-woman show, Harriet Tubman, for years. She has incredible stories about the challenges she’s overcome to deliver this performance. It’s a combination of education and entertainment that brings empowerment to each audience. Chris shares with us how she faced the fear of failure and rejection and learned to adapt to tough situations. She demonstrates how to think positively and proactively while reaching out for help when it’s needed. She shares how we can keep moving forward, so we live with no regrets. I hope you’re inspired to help support Chris and her amazing work. Her story is a beautiful ribbon as we wrap up the package that is this season of Her Rules Radio.

You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/255

Direct download: Her_Rules_Radio_-_Christine_Dixon.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:32pm EST

This show is all about living life by your own rules. One of the challenging areas in which we need to break the rules is in setting boundaries. It’s an ongoing battle for many people--and for most women. Let’s dive into this topic and learn more!

Nancy Levin has written a new book, Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free, and she’s busted a lot of myths around setting boundaries. We’re discussing the nitty-gritty of boundary setting, and Nancy is sharing truth bombs to revolutionize your life and your relationships.

You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/254.


Direct download: Her_Rules_Radio_-_Nancy_Levin_-_Edited.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:00am EST

Creativity, Compassion, Courage...

The 3 C's we need now.


We need to be creative to solve big, new problems we're all facing…


...and we need to be creative to heal, grow into, and discover our best selves.


We need compassion for each other if we're going to come together and survive as a species…


... and we need compassion for ourselves so we can embrace our failures, failings, and fuck-ups, and continue to grow and achieve.


We need COURAGE to change habits that lead to the healing we want, the growth we desire, the relationships we dream of…


... and we need COURAGE to dismantle the unjust systems we live in, speak uncomfortable truths, and stand up for what we believe in.


Becoming an Artist has required all 3 of these - some days all at the same time.

STAYING an Entrepreneur has required all of these… every day.


Today, I’m excited to invite you to the Creatrix Circle 2020, a 28-day group experience with:


  • The support and accountability you need
  • The inspiration you desire
  • The community and coaching you’ll love…


See the info here, and sign up!


Direct download: creativity_courage_compassion.mp3
Category: -- posted at: 11:23am EST

#1 - 9 to 5: 1980, Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda Dolly Parton 

(take out the boss, become the boss, change the system from the inside)

  1. Don’t assume the gorgeous girl is a slut, no matter what the guys are saying about her
  2. If you want to tell a story, you may have to write it yourself… Jane Fonda came up with the idea, then she asked Dolly to come on and Dolly wrote that iconic song for the movie - In fact, Dolly would only be IN the movie if she could write the thems song! (which was SUPER smart - she keeps the IP/Song Writing credits, she owns the songs, the profits, forever.)


#2 - Working Girl: 1988 Melanie Grifith, Harrison Ford, Sigornie Weaver, dress for the job you want, go for the job you’re not “qualified” for, creative thinking (crashes the wedding to pitch her idea to the father of the bride) - Shipping Co President/painting

  1. If you want to grow, find someone to copy (a mentor)
  2.  Just do you - Tess is defined by her unflinching independence throughout Working Girl. "I'm not going to spend the rest of my life working my ass off and getting nowhere just because I followed rules that I had nothing to do with setting up,” she says, marking her refusal to bend to societal gender norms. 


#3 - Baby Boom - leave corporate, follow your dream, leave everything behind, ditch the lame partner holding you back, create your own business, work on your own terms

  1. Sometimes it’s about taking a leap of faith. Quitting a good job with a high salary to move to the country seems like the worst idea ever to some, but “with great risk comes great reward.” (J.C. didn’t say that. Thomas Jefferson did. But J.C. could have.)
  2. You have to thrive where you’re planted, instead of whining about the garden. Sure, J.C. made a mistake in purchasing a lemon of a house. But, she makes it past the frozen well and leaky roof, and she leverages her apple orchard into a successful business to support her child.
  3. Motherhood is hard. It’s no picnic. And you can lose yourself a little, but that doesn’t mean you’re lost forever. It just means you have to adapt and figure out who you are now. And if you go from “Tiger Lady” to country mama and grassroots entrepreneur, that’s more than OK. It’s freaking awesome.


#4: Dirty Dancing - stand up for what you believe in, learn to dance, fall in love with the “wrong guy not good on paper, who is actually a good guy, hard worker, moral, etc.

  1. Have the confidence to be yourself - ‘Nobody puts Baby in the corner,’ is by far the most famous quote to make it out of Dirty Dancing, and for a very good reason. Dance lessons aside, Johnny has the knack of bringing the best out of Baby, whether she’s risking it all to ask her dad for help or getting up on the stage in front of hundreds.
  2. Trust your instincts - Robbie, the medical student, might appear to be the best catch in Kellerman’s, but it's Johnny, Penny and Billy who turn out to be the good guys. As we all know, Robbie gets Penny pregnant and leaves Baby’s father to unknowingly come to the rescue. 'Now, you’ll hurt me if you don’t trust me, all right?' Johnny nails it.
  3. Rules are made to be broken - Sometimes the rules are made to be broken, as demonstrated by Johnny at the end, who despite being fired, returns to Kellerman’s to do the final dance, including that illicit lift.


#5 - Breakfast Club: talk about the dark stuff with people, find weirdos who believe in something, listen to each other - you have more in common than you may think on the surface

  1. John Hughes 1985 classic, The Breakfast Club made stars of Judd Nelson, Molly Ringwald and Emilio Estevez and has become beloved by people all over the world. The story of five kids trapped in Saturday detention is widely regarded as one of the greatest coming of age stories of all time and has taught lessons that are relevant to people of all ages.
  2. To ask the important questions in life.
  3. To be proud of your talents.
  4. No one's home life is perfect.
  5. Never underestimate the power of a dance break.
  6. Growing up sucks.
  7. People aren't always what they seem.
  8. Sometimes breaking the rules has its rewards.
  9. To step out of your comfort zone every once in a while.
  10. Everyone has feelings.
  11. Opposites attract.
  12. Sometimes you end up exactly where you need to be...even if it's Saturday detention


#6 - Pretty In Pink: 

  1. Pretty In Pink is a story of class, humor, and love.
  2. Andie, played by Molly Ringwald, isn’t your typical high school girl. She’s quirky, independent and has her own unique sense of style, one not dictated by name brand clothes. She made the most of what she had.
  3. It resonates with me I think because I relate to feeling like the “poor girl” too, kind of being her actually. A lot of the people I spent time around in junior high and high school were upper middle class I remember, or middle class-plus. Some weren’t, but most were. So I found a character I could relate to who didn’t wear a mask when I did.
  4. like Andie, I grew up in a single parent home, too, from the age of about 11-18. Even though I saw my dad regularly, my mom like Andie’s dad had some mental health issues and was a traumatized human. I didn’t understand it until years later, but I, like Andie, funneled my energies into my job to save money for college (and vintage clothes!), and to be out of the house, which was a depressing place to be.
  5. Accept you’re different and unique: Andie, when sent to the principal’s office for teasing one of the “Richie” girls in gym, says something that is so poignant to me that puts my experience into perspective. The principal tells Andie, who doesn’t quite fit with her status and quirky personal style, that if she keeps putting out signals that she doesn’t want to belong, people will make sure that she doesn’t. To which she responds, “That’s a beautiful theory.”be the weird one, own your own style, work hard, be what you want, no matter what box others put you in, be bizarre and unexpected
  6. STAND UP FOR YOURSELF:  I admire Andie’s boldness in dealing with bullying and awful situations. She kept her head high and stood her ground. I try to be like this in my own life, to speak boldly and unapologetically despite social pressures. 
  7. BE A CREATIVE ALCHEMIST: I always loved Andie’s personal style. She had a way of dressing that was cool and unique. She wore short hair in endless ways. Hats, stockings, pearls ...So cool. Y Andie TOOK APART, AND REWORKED the dress to her liking for a fabulous end product. Andie’s ingenuity shows me that I am enough and that I have more than I might think to my disposal in my life. Her creativity gives me tons of inspiration and courage.


#7 - Dead Poets Society:

  1.  In watching the movie, I was struck by the impact one person can have on the lives of others. Through Keating’s encouragement and leadership, the boys take risks, find their passions, and come to understand the importance of independent thinking. He was able to inspire his students to attempt and accomplish things they hadn’t even dared to dream about before.
  2. It’s not who you are but what you do that defines you. Keating conveys this message to his students because he doesn’t want them to be held back by preconceived ideas. It’s not about race, gender, age, or even experience. People are measured by what they accomplish. Keating encourages action on the part of his students. He wants them to relentlessly pursue their passions. Isn’t that what you want for the people on your team?
  3. Change the angle. Keating tells his students that when you think you have something all figured out, it’s time to look at it from a new perspective. He encourages independent thinking. He wants his students to avoid conformity. We all work for organizations that have their own culture and where there is an established way of doing things—and maybe an established way of thinking. If you really want to break through the status quo, you need to get your people thinking in new and innovative ways. You need to get them looking at things from a new perspective. Warning: In the movie, it costs Keating his job, but it leaves an impression on a group of boys and changes their lives.
  4. Carpe diem—seize the day. Keating tells his students to seize the day. It’s OK to talk and dream, but in the end, it’s action that will allow you to grab the prize. You must encourage action in your people. All of the talking, planning, and strategizing will get you nowhere unless you put them into action. I constantly talk about the employees in our company who are action-oriented. I don’t care that they tend to make more mistakes or pursue endeavors that don’t work out because they’re making something happen. You need to convince your people to seize the day. The time we waste today is gone forever.


Being an optimist is sometimes a revolutionary act, and sometimes the rebellion takes the form of pretending you’re more experienced than you are, leaving the partner who isn’t the right fit for you, starting a business, learning to dance, going for the competition even if you’re not exactly the “right” person for the gig


Find and stick with their weirdos who believe in you - and stick with and support them!


We’re flawed, but we CAN overcome those flaws


Work hard, stick with it, practice, keep showing up, get through the failures.


Get your free How To Write Your Fuck It List Guide: https://alexandrajamieson.com/fuck-it-list/

Category:general -- posted at: 3:18pm EST