Mon, 11 November 2019
Confession: I Was A Copy Cat Coach
I didn’t think I had anything interesting or new to say. Scratch that: I DID believe I had something to say, I just wasn’t saying it. Instead I was copying others and passing it off as my own. Because I was scared...
When I started out as a health coach, 19 years ago, I followed the exact formula set out by the school I attended. That strategy helped me engage and support clients, so I stuck with the formula for years. But then it stopped working. And I thought I just needed a new formula to grow my business again.
So I signed up with a coach who trained me in a new formula and system, and I began to see a new burst of growth and clients. I used that formula for a while, and it started to get harder and harder to find and support new clients.
Was it me? I tend to get bored with systems and formulas, so I have to wonder if my diminishing lack of enthusiasm caused the decrease in clients. Or was it the system?
I then pinballed from coach to coach, system to system, learning new formulas.
That’s when I realized I was copying other coaches. Not just the coaches I was working with, but other coaches who put out newsletters I read, writers who wrote books I loved, and more.
It didn’t feel good.
It wasn’t very successful either.
They say imitation is the highest form of flattery, but when I imitated or copied other coaches, I heard a nagging voice in the back of my mind. The voice said:
“You’re copying someone else. You don’t really have anything original to say. And if it’s not yours, then what good is it? You’re just a poor imitation of someone else. Might as well give up. You’re going to get caught and called out. Better not get too big, or people will notice you’re a fraud…”
UGH. It felt gross.
I hated hearing that voice and the way it made me feel.
The impact of this voice, my Bitch Brain, (AKA Imposter Syndrome, Inner Critic, Resistance), was that I didn’t grow as big as I said I wanted to. My passion for my work was dampened by the fear of being “found out.” My impact on the world, helping women grow into their best versions and create abundant, satisfying lives, was smaller than I dreamed it could be.
And I got called out for my imitation a couple of times.
When I got called out, I made immediate steps to rectify the problem:
But the real work was in seeing that I wasn’t facing my fear:
The fear of putting out my real work, my real ideas, in my true voice, and possibly having it ignored, criticized, or not making an impact with it at all.
In the hard work of becoming yourself, and clearly presenting your vision, teaching, work, or art, you will have to face the voice that says your work isn’t good enough.
It may keep you quiet and not working at your fullest capacity...
It may cause you to copy-paste someone else’s work and not give them credit...
I may even cause you to close up shop and stop pursuing your dream...
...if you let it.
It’s a dance to create who you are, using the inspiration and education you’ve acquired, and not simply copy someone else who inspires you.
The truth is, even the greatest masters learn from someone, and often copy the work of other creators to learn technique.
When we learn how to cook, we use other people’s recipes.
When we start a business, we follow tested models that have worked for others.
But at some point, we reach a place in our work where we itch to create our own unique way of doing it. And some point, it becomes necessary for growth and our own satisfaction.
To become a unique and authentic teacher, artist, or coach, we have to learn how to filter all of our influences through our unique lens of personal experience and vision.
To create something unique and magnetic, healing and useful, we must bravely do the work. And risk getting is wrong.
My own work and drive to create is fueled in part by a desire to be original and fuse all the truths together.
Your work, or art, or services are a tapestry of all of your experiences and education, sewn and woven together in real time, always evolving.
You are a coat of many colors, not a copy-paste meme.
In a few weeks I’ll open applications for the Creatrix 2020 Mentorship. If you would like to have first access to the application process, just let me know here:
Wed, 6 November 2019
Today’s show is about owning all the parts of yourself, including the one we call the “dark night of the soul.” If you’re not familiar with the phrase, you’re probably well-acquainted with the feelings that characterize this state. Let’s jump in together and learn more!
Liyana Silver is a good friend, coach, and author. We’ve known each other for years. Liyana’s teaching is called “Mining for Gold in a Dark Night of the Soul.” She’s an amazing coach who helps women move through their dark night and into their bodies and souls. Her first book is called Feminine Genius: The Provocative Path to Waking Up and Turning On the Wisdom of Being a Woman.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/237
Mon, 28 October 2019
A short Power Pod for coaches, leaders, teachers, healers, doctors, and consultants on the edge you get with creative thinking techniques for professional success. Studies from Montreal and Harvard shine a light on the benefits of art and creativity.
Wed, 23 October 2019
Today’s show highlights a fascinating PBS documentary, which premieres just a few days from now. It’s made by a dear friend of mine and covers an intriguing phenomenon taking place in Boise, Idaho.
Beth Aala is a three-time Emmy Award-winning producer and Peabody Award winner for her documentary work at HBO. Her most recent documentary is Rancher, Farmer, Fisherman, which she co-directed and produced. It premiered at the Sundance Film Festival in 2017. Beth is here to discuss her new documentary that will air on PBS on October 28, so check your local listings for more information. The film is called Made In Boise, and it highlights the incredible, booming surrogacy industry that has emerged in Boise, Idaho. Beth shares her approach to the film, the relationships she witnesses, the politics of surrogacy, and the number of strong feelings and opinions brought on by this topic. I believe it’s important for women to see and hear stories about women that are made by women. Beth has built her successful career around the creation of these stories.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/235
Mon, 14 October 2019
Authentic leaders know who they are, and let people in on their truth.
Coaching to uncover your authentic truth is not just about solving problems. Coaching helps you avoid problems by providing accountability and space to think and be more clear and intentional about your goals and actions. And coaching is really helpful for getting clear about where you want to go, and how you want to feel.
Coaches don’t provide a lot of answers, but they do ask a lot of great questions to help you find your own answers.
Here's a list of my top favorite questions that I use with private coaching clients that create:
Go to https://alexandrajamieson.com/fuck-it-list/ for the free How To Write Your F*ck It Guide workbook!
Wed, 9 October 2019
You’re in for a treat on today’s show as we welcome back one of my favorite guests to talk about some of my favorite topics! We are talking about hormones and sexuality with one of the leading holistic doctors. Middle age brings with it many changes in our physical and sexual health. We’ll cover energy, focus, hormones, and sexuality as they relate to the way our bodies age.
Dr. Anna Cabeca has much to teach us about feeling safe in our bodies and sexual relationships. We’ve been friends for years, and I trust her and her products, and I use them faithfully. She understands the dropoff in energy and focus that comes with middle age, and she knows that balancing our hormones and drives in our bodies support our long-term relationships and our self-worth. If you’re struggling with any of these hormone-related issues, then this is the show for you.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/233
Tue, 1 October 2019
Our little show turns 5 years old this month! We've built an incredible community here, and you're to thank. A recap, what's next, and a sneak peek into the behind the scenes of my latest Rich Creatrix Mentorship Retreat in NYC!
Life mapping for creative leadership success, banishing imposter syndrome, and more!
Thanks for being a part of our community here.
Direct download: rich_creatrix_pod.mp3
Category: -- posted at: 10:13am EST
Wed, 25 September 2019
We are diving into deep juiciness today as we explore the topics covered in a new book. This book will challenge your thinking about traditional Christianity and religion, especially regarding the role of women in ancient times as spiritual authorities. Come explore this topic with today’s amazing guest!
Meggan Watterson is a feminist theologian with a Master of Theological Studies degree from Harvard Divinity School and a Master of Divinity from Columbia University. She’s a teacher and writer who leads retreats and workshops on the Divine Feminine and The Soul-Voice Meditation. She is powerful and passionate about her love for Christianity, which wasn’t revealed to her until later in life. Meggan’s latest book is Mary Magdalene Revealed: The First Apostle, Her Feminist Gospel & the Christianity We Haven’t Tried Yet. The book explores the deep, rich history of women in early Christianity in a fascinating way.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/231
Wed, 18 September 2019
25 non-fiction, self-help, and "fluffy fiction" books I read this summer:
How do I source all these books?
Libby and Overdrive Apps - both require a library card, you can download ebooks and audio books for free, or place a hold and they’ll be delivered to your device when it’s your turn.
ThriftBooks app - used books for sale (usually for very cheap) by the owner
Powells.com - used and new books, and you can enter the ISBN from your books and they’ll buy them back from you. You just ship them to Powells with their pre-paid shipping label and I always get credit on their website.
Also, KindleUnlimited - it costs a bit, but for my fluffy fiction I go through them pretty fast. I also know that those authors do get paid by the page count I read, so that feels good.
I’d be lying if I said I never get tempted by a good old fashioned book store - this summer I was in my home town of Portland, OR and simply HAD to get a new book off the shelves.
How I keep track of what I've read for future reference:
For the non-fiction books, I like to take notes. I use Evernote and quote passages or write inspirations I get from the reading. Then I can tag them for future reference. So I have tags like coaching, growth mindset, courage, confidence, creativity, and marketing. I know some people use a google doc for this as well, which I use google for everything else, but Evernote’s tagging system is easier for me. Also, Evernote’s app is easier for me to use and I listen on the go a lot.
Wed, 11 September 2019
As we return to the show after a refreshing summer break, I have a special guest and a new book to share with you about a tough topic that’s close to my heart. September is Suicide Prevention Month, and this week is Suicide Prevention Week. It’s super appropriate that we discuss what life is like for the survivors left behind after the suicide of a loved one. This is something that’s been prevalent in my family, and some of my earliest memories are of the aftermath of a loved one’s suicide. Let’s dive into this topic together!
Sarah Neustadter, Ph.D., is the author of Love You Like the Sky: Surviving the Suicide of a Beloved. The book is heart-wrenching and useful, written from the perspective of a suicide survivor and psychologist. The healing process is an unfolding of growing and learning, but the important thing to know is that there IS help. Sarah wrote this book because all the books she found didn’t touch the raw emotions she felt at the death of her beloved several years ago. She was confronted with hard questions, so the book is designed as a map for navigating complicated grief and understanding grief as a way toward deeper transformation from despair to beauty.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/219
Direct download: Her_Rules_Radio_-_Love_You_Like_the_Sky_-_Edited.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:00am EST
Mon, 29 July 2019
Ever feel like the people in your life just don’t get you?
Or like they’re trying, unconsciously or obviously, to keep you small?
Ever hear about the “bucket of crabs mentality?”
We humans get spooked when people in our life change - it upsets the energy dynamic, and makes us question their own choices… if we’re unaware and unwilling to talk about these things.
See, when you rise up and make creative moves or take bold action, people in your life might get scared that things will change for them… (or they get a big jealous that they’re not taking action on their own dreams.)
Most people don’t have the personal awareness to see their Crab Mentality.
So people all around you might be unconsciously lashing out, reacting and trying to keep you small so their world doesn’t change One. Little. Bit.
That’s why you’ve gotta trust your gut, name.
You’ve gotta fiercely tune into your own knowing, your personal truth, and your own sense of self.
AND, you’ve gotta surround yourself with people who are working on their own grand dreams who are going to cheer you on, not drag you down.
When you’re an artist, healer-teacher, coach, doctor, or creative entrepreneur, you’re always striving to do something different.
When you’re a high-achiever, you’re usually aiming to break barriers and create a new level of performance.
Are you surrounded by people who will hold your hand while cheering you on? People who will tell you it’s ok to screw up - and to keep going?
Every book, movie, painting, or important product you’ve ever loved or admired was created by someone with an idea that came out of the ether:
YOUR creative ideas, business, or unique innovations may seem too risky to someone else, but YOUR gut knows.
There’s something magic there.
And it’s worthwhile to pursue it.
Even if it doesn’t turn out exactly as we originally thought, we learn ourselves through the doing.
And we might just make something better than we ever dreamed.
This Friday, I’m leading a special training for your Creatrix soul, called:
Sign up here to get your seat and I’ll see you August 2nd:
Mon, 22 July 2019
We all have habits that get us stuck, and many of them originate from fear. Beginning from an unconscious drive for survival through fight, flight, or freeze reactions, our old habits can block our creative voice from shining.
They’re normal human responses, but to your Creatrix, your unique, productive soul, they are a waste of time, life force, and self-empowerment. When we get stuck by these blocks, we stunt our wisdom, productivity, and creativity.
Mon, 15 July 2019
To have an impact, do work that is uniquely you, and make a good living while doing it...it’s a dream for many of us.
Over the last 19 years as an independent, creative entrepreneur, I’ve been able to do work that I love, while helping people grow and heal, all while earning enough to support myself and my family. It is a huge blessing.
And it hasn’t always been easy!
As I prepare to lead another group of amazing womxn through the Rich Creatrix Mentorship, beginning August 15th, I want to share with you six of the important lessons in creative entrepreneurship I’ve experienced and growth through.
Here were some of my greatest challenges, blocks, and lessons, in becoming a Rich Creatrix:
Direct download: My_disaster_dairy_.mp3
Category: -- posted at: 3:49pm EST
Wed, 10 July 2019
It’s no secret that most women harbor fear, shame, guilt, and some degree of curiosity around their sexuality. Today’s show addresses these issues and takes an honest, deep dive into all things sexual. Join us!
Olive Persimmon has written The Coitus Chronicles, which is described as a diary of your hilarious friend’s quest to heal her relationship with her body, sexuality, love, and her exploration of orgasm. The book is insightful, educational, and funny; I loved it from start to finish! In today’s conversation, we journey far and wide in our discussion of sexuality, STI’s, orgasm, BDSM, pick-up artists, foot fetish, and everything in between.
You can find the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/226.
Wed, 3 July 2019
Memoirs by musicians and comedians are some of my favorite books. Today I share the top lessons I gleaned from Steve Martin's Born Standing Up.
From burning down your work to start fresh, and going against the grain to stand out, to the truth about how professionals pivot, these 9 lessons are valuable for any entrepreneur, coach, or healer.
Wed, 19 June 2019
I’m always looking for topics I find inspiring and thought-provoking in this time when we as women feel uncertain, unheard, and like we are losing hope. Today’s show is all about hope and change--and how young, intelligent women are making a difference!
Andrea Flores is the co-writer of a new book, Yes She Can: 10 Stories of Hope & Change from Young Female Staffers of the Obama White House. Andrea is a lawyer in Washington, DC, and served as the regional director for Hillary Clinton’s 2016 presidential campaign. She spent 3 years in several key positions in the Obama White House and worked on the immigration bill that failed to get passed. Before that, she worked in New Mexico on the local government level. She was the first Latinx student body president in the history of Harvard University and graduated from Columbia Law School. (Latinx is a gender-neutral term used to refer to those of Latin origin.)
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/224.
Wed, 12 June 2019
Have you ever been told that you have a book inside of you just waiting to get out? Today’s show addresses why that might be true! We’re talking to a dear friend who is making it her mission to bring out the writer in everyone!
Cynthia Morris is a coach to writers, artists, and entrepreneurs to help them bring their ideas into form. For over 20 years, she’s helped thousands get beyond their excuses to create works that matter. She’s written 8 books herself, including a Paris historical novel about Sylvia Beach. You can find her books at www.originalimpulse.com. On today’s show, we’re talking about her latest book, The Busy Woman’s Guide to Writing a World-Changing Book. This is an inspirational book by a woman about our creative process. Cynthia talks about the mindset piece of writing, along with the nuts and bolts of structure, tools, and prompts. She explains how the Renaissance woman of today needs both structure and flexibility and how to write a book on schedule, no matter how busy you are.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/223
Tue, 4 June 2019
Feeling unclear about your creative ideas? This 50 Reasons exercise will help you get clear right away.
Join the Rich Creatrix 14-Day Challenge, starting June 7th, 2019: www.herrulesradio.com/shop
Wed, 22 May 2019
In today’s short Power Pod episode, we are diving deep into a particular topic that comes up a lot in my work with clients. We’re discussing 3 Thinking Traps that are stopping driven and success-minded woman from achieving what they want. Today’s word is NOT just for women, and NOT just for my clients, so listen up!
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/222
Mon, 13 May 2019
Our youth-obsessed culture has brainwashed us to believe that we are somehow past our prime. (Actually, it’s a flavor of the toxic patriarchy that we live in: us womxn are always told we’re too old… or too young!)
We see stories that exalt The 30 Under 30, the stories of precocious founders or influencer who “hit it big” before most of us finished grad school.
What they don’t tell you, and what doesn’t get enough attention, is that hitting it big at a young age is the exception, not the rule.
But those are the stories we hear about most often. And it’s disheartening.
So I’m here to share a few inspiring tales of famous folk you admire, and a few of my proud clients, who weren’t young, overnight sensations:
Get private coaching from me:https://alexandrajamieson.com/private-coaching/
Wed, 8 May 2019
Imposter Syndrome is real, especially for certain high-achieving women
How to end imposter syndrome
Online training with Alexandra Jamieson
Wed, 1 May 2019
If you’re a mom, then you know what it feels like to always be pressured to do more. You run yourself ragged trying to keep up the appearance of being a great mom, and getting to and from all the kids’ activities is about to push you over the edge. Sound familiar? The good news is that it’s OK to slow down and do LESS----and you’ll find more satisfaction and joy along the way.
Kate Northrup is an entrepreneur, activist, bestselling author, wife, and mom who supports ambitious, motivated, successful women to light up the world without burning themselves out in the process. Her new book is Do Less: A Revolutionary Approach to Time and Energy Management for Busy Moms, and Kate’s here to share what she has discovered.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/219
Mon, 22 April 2019
This is a story about coming out of hiding, admitting what we want, who we are, and taking bold, bright, beautiful action on behalf of our dreams.
This is a story about becoming the Mother of Dragons.
Wed, 17 April 2019
Why do most of us equate our worth as a woman with our body weight? There is no good answer, but we can all agree that things need to change! Our size and body weight has nothing to do with how we deserve love and respect. We’re diving into transformational thinking with today’s guest!
Susan Hyatt has been a life coach for the past 12 years. She has written a brand new book called Bare: A 7-Week Program to Transform Your Body, Get More Energy, Feel Amazing, and Become the Bravest, Most Unstoppable Version of You. The book distills the program she’s been teaching to her clients for years. The book covers the foundation principles that you are more than your body; you are whole and complete with unlimited potential. Susan wants women to feel satisfied and well in their bodies. Susan’s work focuses on how we should treat our bodies with care, love, and respect, and shed the mindset that keeps us weighted down and too exhausted and afraid to be seen. We need to quit worrying about our weight and focus on the things that really matter!
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/217.
Direct download: Her_Rules_Radio_Get_BARE_with_Susan_Hyatt_-_Edited.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:00am EST
Mon, 8 April 2019
The stuff that's burning to be created through you? It could be the key to your happiness, wellness, and life satisfaction. Listen in and get inspired to stop stopping yourself.
Wed, 3 April 2019
The mind-body connection is a hot topic today, but there is much more to this phenomenon than you probably realize. In today’s show, we are talking positive psychology, positive mindset, and positive movement. We’re diving deep into a new book written by a great friend!
Erin Stutland is a holistic wellness expert and cheerleader in my life. Her new book, Mantras in Motion, is the distillation of many years of work in helping people harness the physical, spiritual, and mental energy in service of what they want. Erin shares how to become more mindful and stay in the moment to cut off negative thinking. She’ll teach us some cool journaling exercises and motivational mantras to use while we move. Her book isn’t merely words on pages but can inject energy into your life!
You can find the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/215
Direct download: Her_Rules_Radio_-_Mantras_In_Motion_with_Erin_Stutland_-_Edited.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:00am EST
Mon, 25 March 2019
It's spring and it's my birthday week! Get the scoop on how to quickly enter an amazing book give away!
Direct download: birthday_book_bribe.mp3
Category: -- posted at: 1:59pm EST
Wed, 20 March 2019
We’re talking all things female health in today’s show as we take a deep dive with an incredible coach and educator. Join us as we discuss menstruation, birth control, fertility, period pain, hormones, inflammation, and more!
Lisa Hendrickson-Jack is a Certified Fertility Awareness Educator, Holistic Reproductive Health Practitioner, and author. Her new book is The Fifth Vital Sign: Master Your Cycles and Optimize Your Fertility. The book covers essential topics to help empower you to take control of your health, moods, energy, life, and fertility. We’re discussing how the world’s educational systems have failed to teach us about our fertility, our hormones, and the intricate symphony that is our female health. Lisa helps health-conscious women discover the connection between our menstrual cycles and our overall health so that we can do many things, including ditch our hormonal birth control forever. Lisa is a pure genius at this work, and I’m thrilled to have her on the show!
Mon, 4 March 2019
Revisiting the classic 80s book Energy Medicine, I'm reminded of the value of "mental rehearsal."
Olympic coaches and athletes use visualization and embodiment practices to bring intentions and goal setting to life.
Discover how creating and experiencing a vivid image of your desired outcomes can help you "feel the future."
Wed, 27 February 2019
Happy Menopause - is that really how we think of it? Let’s be real and say that menopause and its symptoms are NOT the things we look forward to! In honor of February, when we’re focusing on self-love and women’s pleasure, we are diving deep into all the aspects of menopause and learning that it really CAN be a happy (and healthy!) time for women.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/211.
Mon, 18 February 2019
We humans define ourselves and learn best through stories.
Story tellers are revered members of society, and your story is totally unique to you...
Stories help us evolve, change, and envision a bigger, different life.
It's time to reexamine and tell yours.
Get the free How To Write Your F*ck It List Guide here: www.herrulesradio.com/shop
Wed, 13 February 2019
We’re serving up some self-love for Valentine’s Day. It’s time to ask yourself what you really want and to listen to your body and soul. We are diving deep today into all things pleasure. Join us.
Xanet Pialet is a teacher, and author of the bestselling book, Living an Orgasmic Life. She’ll explain tantra and why this topic is so important. Pleasure and feeling good is an important topic for women, so we can create and have what we want. Xanet explains how she helps people get through all the rules we have about sex, sensuality, and pleasure. Through her private coaching practice, Xanet helps individuals and couples who struggle with desire, sexless marriages, and sexual abuse and trauma.
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/209
Wed, 30 January 2019
Essential oils---you hear about them everywhere! Whether you’re a skeptic, a novice, or an experienced EO user, today’s show is packed with useful and practical information that you don’t want to miss! As the child of a hippie mom in Oregon in the 70’s, you can imagine that essential oils were, and still are, a huge part of my life. I turn to them daily, keep them placed strategically around me, and take them with me everywhere!
Dr. Mariza Snyder joins me today as we discuss her new book, The Essential Oils Hormone Solution. She’s a return guest to the show, a good friend of mine, and she’s just a super fun and brilliant person to be around. She firmly believes that you can balance your hormones by using essential oils and self-care rituals. Her goal is to help people transform their lives and become the CEO of their own healthcare. In this episode, we discuss stress, energy fatigue, concentration, cravings, libido, anxiety, toxicity, and more. Join us for this jam-packed conversation, and get yourself a copy of her 7th book!
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/208
Wed, 16 January 2019
It’s a new year, and I, for one, am glad 2018 is over! We are changing up the format of the show, going from a weekly show format to doing two shows monthly with quality guests and conversations. I’m also spending more time and attention in my painting endeavors, which bring me much joy, pleasure, and healing. Through all my roles as artist, coach, and mentor, I’m working hard to always stay aligned with my values, so I hope the show continues to be an authentic outlet for me that brings great value to you, the listener.
Marsha Jones is from the Afiya Center in Texas. Their work is centered around the experience for black women, especially in services for reproductive health. The center is a voice to advocate against harmful policies and legislation that keep these women at risk. Maternal mortality is a huge issue all around the world, and specifically in Texas, where maternal mortality has doubled in recent years! The Afiya Center provides outreach, education, and care to aid these women who have been largely ignored and passed over on the legislative front. Is it medical murder when their pain is ignored and they aren’t given appropriate care?
You can read the full show notes at www.alexandrajamieson.com/207